Gismo
10th December 2003, 10:07 PM
The gorilla keepers at Edinburgh Zoo were in crisis talks regarding the state of their recently donated rare breed female Gorilla.
For some time now she had been showing severe signs of depression due to the lack of a suitable mate to keep her occupied and happy during the cold winter months.
Whit are we gonna dae, said the heid keeper to the assembled group, the zoo manager replied I’m not sure what we can do.
Hold on said the janny, we could always ask wee Shuggie, he’d S”@* anything in a skirt.
Right, exclaimed the manager, get him in here, wee Shuggie duly arrives wondering what all the fuss is about.
Sit down Shuggie, we’ve got a proposal for ye, for £500 we’d like you to entertain our rare gorilla and “show” her a good time.
I see said Shuggie, well, I’ll need a couple of hours to think about it.
Take all the time you need and get back to us said the manager, so, Shuggie goes off to contemplate his offer.
Finally Shuggie returns, ok he says, I’ll do what you ask but I have 3 provisions, go ahead said the heid keeper, right firstly, I don’t want anyone to know about what I’m about to do, secondly, I want her to be dressed up in a little maids outfit and thirdly, yes yes go on the manager said hurriedly, and thirdly you’ll have to give me plenty of overtime to make up the £500
For some time now she had been showing severe signs of depression due to the lack of a suitable mate to keep her occupied and happy during the cold winter months.
Whit are we gonna dae, said the heid keeper to the assembled group, the zoo manager replied I’m not sure what we can do.
Hold on said the janny, we could always ask wee Shuggie, he’d S”@* anything in a skirt.
Right, exclaimed the manager, get him in here, wee Shuggie duly arrives wondering what all the fuss is about.
Sit down Shuggie, we’ve got a proposal for ye, for £500 we’d like you to entertain our rare gorilla and “show” her a good time.
I see said Shuggie, well, I’ll need a couple of hours to think about it.
Take all the time you need and get back to us said the manager, so, Shuggie goes off to contemplate his offer.
Finally Shuggie returns, ok he says, I’ll do what you ask but I have 3 provisions, go ahead said the heid keeper, right firstly, I don’t want anyone to know about what I’m about to do, secondly, I want her to be dressed up in a little maids outfit and thirdly, yes yes go on the manager said hurriedly, and thirdly you’ll have to give me plenty of overtime to make up the £500