X30YES
28th March 2006, 05:48 PM
While I was out driving down the M4 the other day,
( going a little faster than I should have been) I passed under a
bridge
only to see a
policeman on the other side with a radar gun, laying in wait.
The policeman pulled me over, walked up to the car and with that
classic, patronising smirk, asked:
"Runway too short"?
To which I replied. " I'm late for work."
To which he asked, "What do you do?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher," I responded
The policeman was confused.
"A what? a rectum stretcher, and just what does a rectum stretcher
do?"
"Well," I said "I start by inserting one finger then i work my way up
to
two fingers, then three, then four , then with my whole hand in, work
side
to side until I can stretch and stretch and then I slowly but surely
stretch the hole until its about 6 feet"
The policeman then asked questioningly and cautiously. " And just
what
do you do with a six-foot arsehole"
To which I politely replied, " You give it a radar gun and park it
behind a bridge......."
Speeding ticket: £105
Court costs: £45
Look on policemans face: Priceless
( going a little faster than I should have been) I passed under a
bridge
only to see a
policeman on the other side with a radar gun, laying in wait.
The policeman pulled me over, walked up to the car and with that
classic, patronising smirk, asked:
"Runway too short"?
To which I replied. " I'm late for work."
To which he asked, "What do you do?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher," I responded
The policeman was confused.
"A what? a rectum stretcher, and just what does a rectum stretcher
do?"
"Well," I said "I start by inserting one finger then i work my way up
to
two fingers, then three, then four , then with my whole hand in, work
side
to side until I can stretch and stretch and then I slowly but surely
stretch the hole until its about 6 feet"
The policeman then asked questioningly and cautiously. " And just
what
do you do with a six-foot arsehole"
To which I politely replied, " You give it a radar gun and park it
behind a bridge......."
Speeding ticket: £105
Court costs: £45
Look on policemans face: Priceless