monkimagic
3rd July 2004, 01:06 AM
had a chuckle at this!!
The genius of Peter Kay
> > >2) When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I
> > >realized, God doesn't work that way, so I stole one and asked him to
> > >forgive me..
> > >
> > >3) My mom was a ventriloquist and she always was throwing her voice.
> > >For ten years I thought the dog was telling me to kill my father.
> > >
> > >4) I've often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife
> > >to go swimming.
> > >
> > >5) I was doing some decorating, so I got out my step-ladder. I don't
> > >get on with my real ladder.
> > >
> > >6) I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I
> > >ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.
> > >
> > >7) Well I was bullied at school, called all kinds of different names.
> > >but one day I turned to my bullies and said - 'Sticks and stones may
> > >break my
> > >bones but names will never hurt me', and it worked! From there on it
> > >was sticks and stones all the way.
> > >
> > >
> > >8) My Dad used to say 'always fight fire with fire', which is probably
> > >why he got thrown out of the fire brigade.
> > >
> > >9) Sex is like a game of bridge: If you don't have a good partner,
> > >you'd better have a good hand.
> > >
> > >10) I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour
> > >said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, Six should be enough.'
> > >
> > >11) If we aren't supposed to eat animals, then why are they made out of
> > >meat?
> > >
> > >12) I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and
> > >give the wrong answers.
> > >
:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D
Monki
The genius of Peter Kay
> > >2) When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I
> > >realized, God doesn't work that way, so I stole one and asked him to
> > >forgive me..
> > >
> > >3) My mom was a ventriloquist and she always was throwing her voice.
> > >For ten years I thought the dog was telling me to kill my father.
> > >
> > >4) I've often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife
> > >to go swimming.
> > >
> > >5) I was doing some decorating, so I got out my step-ladder. I don't
> > >get on with my real ladder.
> > >
> > >6) I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I
> > >ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.
> > >
> > >7) Well I was bullied at school, called all kinds of different names.
> > >but one day I turned to my bullies and said - 'Sticks and stones may
> > >break my
> > >bones but names will never hurt me', and it worked! From there on it
> > >was sticks and stones all the way.
> > >
> > >
> > >8) My Dad used to say 'always fight fire with fire', which is probably
> > >why he got thrown out of the fire brigade.
> > >
> > >9) Sex is like a game of bridge: If you don't have a good partner,
> > >you'd better have a good hand.
> > >
> > >10) I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour
> > >said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, Six should be enough.'
> > >
> > >11) If we aren't supposed to eat animals, then why are they made out of
> > >meat?
> > >
> > >12) I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and
> > >give the wrong answers.
> > >
:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D
Monki