Mini Martyn
28th April 2004, 12:15 AM
That Sounds Dirty
TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN THE OFFICE AREN'T:
10. I need to whip it out by 5.
9. Mind if I use your laptop?
8. Just stick it in my box
7. If I have to lick one more, I'll gag!
6. I want it on my desk, NOW!!!!!
5. HMMMMM, I think it's out of fluid!
4.My equipment is so old it takes forever to finish.
3. It's an entry-level position.
2. When do you think you'll be getting off today?
And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty, but at the office isn't:
1. it's not fair. I do all the work while he just sits there!!!
TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN A LAW FIRM AREN'T:
10. Have you looked through her briefs?
9. He is one hard judge.
8. Counselor, let's do it in chambers.
7. Her attorney withdrew at the last minute.
6. Is it a penal offence?
5. Better leave the handcuffs on.
4. For $200 an hour, she better be good!
3. Can you get him to drop his suit?
2. The judge gave her the stiffest one he could.
And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty but in a law firm isn't:
1. Think you can get me off?
TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN GOLF AREN'T:
10. Damn, my shaft is bent.
9. After 18 holes, I can barely walk.
8. You really whacked the hell out of that sucker.
7. Look at the size of his putter.
6. Keep your head down and spread your legs a bit more.
5. Mind if I join your threesome?
4. Stand with your back turned and drop it.
3. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip.
2. Nice stroke but your follow-through leaves a lot to be desired.
And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty, but in golf isn't:
1. Hold up! I need to wash my balls first
TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN THE OFFICE AREN'T:
10. I need to whip it out by 5.
9. Mind if I use your laptop?
8. Just stick it in my box
7. If I have to lick one more, I'll gag!
6. I want it on my desk, NOW!!!!!
5. HMMMMM, I think it's out of fluid!
4.My equipment is so old it takes forever to finish.
3. It's an entry-level position.
2. When do you think you'll be getting off today?
And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty, but at the office isn't:
1. it's not fair. I do all the work while he just sits there!!!
TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN A LAW FIRM AREN'T:
10. Have you looked through her briefs?
9. He is one hard judge.
8. Counselor, let's do it in chambers.
7. Her attorney withdrew at the last minute.
6. Is it a penal offence?
5. Better leave the handcuffs on.
4. For $200 an hour, she better be good!
3. Can you get him to drop his suit?
2. The judge gave her the stiffest one he could.
And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty but in a law firm isn't:
1. Think you can get me off?
TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN GOLF AREN'T:
10. Damn, my shaft is bent.
9. After 18 holes, I can barely walk.
8. You really whacked the hell out of that sucker.
7. Look at the size of his putter.
6. Keep your head down and spread your legs a bit more.
5. Mind if I join your threesome?
4. Stand with your back turned and drop it.
3. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip.
2. Nice stroke but your follow-through leaves a lot to be desired.
And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty, but in golf isn't:
1. Hold up! I need to wash my balls first