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View Full Version : Love-to-hate "office speak" phrases.



AndyP & Lenore
17th June 2008, 07:38 AM
Some of these are brilliant.

Must start using them in the cinema with the staff.

Especially "pre-planning", "forward thinking" and from this day hence, we will never ever have "problems" again, they will be known as "challenges!":laugh:

clicky linky (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/7457287.stm)

A.:smilewinkgrin:

Gismo
17th June 2008, 07:53 AM
Sadly, my working environment must have 500 per cent of the catch phrase kings and queens.
There was even a bingo card made up by someone with all the relevant non sensical phrases on there which was taken to various meetings and the first person to fill their card had to shout out house :D

AndyP & Lenore
17th June 2008, 08:06 AM
Sadly, my working environment must have 500 per cent of the catch phrase kings and queens.
There was even a bingo card made up by someone with all the relevant non sensical phrases on there which was taken to various meetings and the first person to fill their card had to shout out house :D

pmsl.:laugh::laugh::laugh::laugh:

What did you win?:shut up:

A.:popcorn:

Gismo
17th June 2008, 10:48 AM
One of most hated:-
"not a team player" with the response



"There's no I in team..........only me" :ragin: :argh:

Laineee
17th June 2008, 08:03 PM
Think I might use the bingo card idea - I have to listen to pretty much all of those on a daily basis. My particular favourite is a weekly project meeting where apparently the only topic for discussion is the fact that we need people to stop working in silos to increase granularity going forward..... :frown: :argh: :thud:

My department are all under strict instructions to shoot me if I ever start spouting management w**kspeak like that!

N12 JLK
17th June 2008, 08:37 PM
Andy, I think we should take this one "off-line." We can "run it up the flag pole" on Sunday when we meet. Perhaps a "brain-storming" session will be in order to "bury" the "issue."

I played **** work bingo at work once, it was great. you then had to try and fir house into the conversation without the big boss noticing. Brilliant!

Scottie
17th June 2008, 10:10 PM
not exactly office speak as such but then again maybe it is.

it goes something like this.

Hey boss will all this out sourcing affect me or my job.

reply

don't worry you job will be safe and there will be no changes. :thud: NOT

Sheilz
17th June 2008, 10:43 PM
Cooncils just love jargon, social work depts especially. I believe there was a memo put out about not using the term brainstorming coz it could be considered as discriminatory against certain social groups.:moonie:

AndyP & Lenore
17th June 2008, 10:56 PM
Cooncils just love jargon, social work depts especially. I believe there was a memo put out about not using the term brainstorming coz it could be considered as discriminatory against certain social groups.:moonie:

Aberdonians?:laugh::laugh::laugh:

<<<Runs and hides.:moonie:

A.:D

Bumble
18th June 2008, 06:28 PM
Keep running Mr P!

Laineee
18th June 2008, 07:53 PM
not exactly office speak as such but then again maybe it is.

it goes something like this.

Hey boss will all this out sourcing affect me or my job.

reply

don't worry you job will be safe and there will be no changes. :thud: NOT

Or my current favourite "don't worry your job will be safe but we expect you to do twice as much work to clear up the mistakes by people on the other side of the world. Oh, and it'll still be your fault when they do things wrong" :ragin:

But maybe I'm just bitter given the day I just had!! :smilewinkgrin:

Sheilz
18th June 2008, 08:46 PM
Keep running Mr P!


..............and running (just for the hell of it:thumbs up:);bigwave: